What are the Qualities of a Good spouse?
Finding the right person as a life companion is never an easy task. As much as people say you will naturally know when you meet the right one, it does not always work that way. Your choice is typically backed by how many standards this person meets.
These standards are unique to each person. They define the taste, values, and preferences of what you want in your future spouse. However, in addition to these unique standards, Stellar-advice going to outline the most important ones you should consider in a potential mate.
Typically, a person wants their potential good spouse to show:
- Unwavering love
- Respect
- Shared interest
- Compassion
- Emotional availability
- The ability to create mutual fun.
These expectations cut across all relationships. Right? They determine the compatibility between you and your partner. They are also the foundation upon which the success of what a healthy relationship should start with and is built upon. However, in addition to these expectations, other qualities combine to make a person a good long-term partner. What other qualities should you be looking for in someone?
1. Similar Values Shared with You
Values are worldviews that guide how the two of you will see, view, and live your lives. They are rooted in personal beliefs that the two of you have accumulated over time separately, and they are difficult and almost impossible to change. This is why you should seek a partner who has similar beliefs and values. It will make growing together much easier because of shared common ground.
Therefore, while you are trying to choose a good husband or wife, consider finding someone who shares similar values with you. These values will help align spiritual, emotional, and mental beliefs. They will serve as key indicators whether or not your relationship has the potential for longevity.
Having similar values means you have similar thought frequencies and will always arrive at similar conclusions.
2. Emotional Intelligence or Maturity
Emotional intelligence is an important quality that determines how the two of you will control and manage your impulses. The higher the intelligence, the higher the likelihood and the capacity to deal with unfavorable situations that can bring sudden change, stress, and disappointment in your marriage.
Selecting an emotionally mature person is crucial in determining a good husband/wife. A good potential good spouse must have the capacity to responsibly respond to challenging issues while retaining support, love, and attention to keep you happy and vice versa.
3. Acceptance of Shortcomings and Appreciation of You Regardless
We all have good qualities, and some bad ones. The quality of our personalities is determined by how often we show our good qualities and try to improve the bad ones. So, if you are looking for a good spouse, make sure that you ensure he or she accepts some of your shortcomings as much as he appreciates your good qualities!
However, that is no excuse for you to not work on your own shortcomings because we all have them. As a good spouse needs to recognize and accept imperfection, he or she also is capable of identifying the will to change. Therefore, the two of you should reward each other’s positivity with improvement.
4. Skills of Conflict Resolution
No matter how similar your interests and values may be, it’s impossible to avoid conflict in a successful relationship. Despite some couples wanting to avoid difficult topics for fear of disagreement, it’s helpful to know these difficult subjects can enhance intimacy and keep a relationship strong. Therefore, instead of avoiding conflict in fear, learn how to properly resolve them.
To do this, you must add great conflict resolution skills to the qualities you are looking for in a good spouse by prioritizing healthy communication between the two of you.
Healthy communication skills create a happy marriage, de-escalate tension, and allow for an understanding of contrasting points of view to achieve a resolution or a compromise.
5. Shared Experiences
Most married men and women over time can complain about whether their spouse care about their relationship or not. Perhaps either spouse may be taking advantage by spending long hours at work or preferring other pursuits. While this can happen from time to time for every person in their marriage, it is also important to note that great spouses will prioritize who or what is really important for who they love and adore.
Therefore, the ability to create a shared positive experience is an important quality to look out for in someone. The spouse should be able to prioritize the relationship, despite the existence and pursuit of other life priorities. Constant efforts and investment in the relationship are the foundation for creating a shared positive experience in the marriage.
6. Sense of Humor
Like friends, couples also have inside jokes they often share. The best ones are those that do not require verbal expression to be passed across. Those who share similar humor style with their potential mates tend to have a happy relationship when they eventually tie the knot.
On a deeper note, the journey of life isn’t smooth: it’s filled with several bumps along the way. This is why a good sense of humor is crucial in weathering the lows in the journey of life.
Another quality of a good partner is their desire and willingness to plan a future with you. You should want someone who wants to invest themselves in a relationship with you for the two of you to function as a unit for the long haul. A good potential spouse should include you in all of their plans and request your input at all times. You will notice this before marriage when he or she integrates you into all areas of their life.
If he or she is able to comfortably do this with you when you are not married, it should not be a problem when the two of you decide to get married.
8. Teach You New Things
A good spouse should be able to teach you positive new things that can help you open up and grow. It fosters growth by the two of challenging each other in areas you aren’t familiar in. As much as he or she cares about your interests and hobbies, they should be able to let you into their own. This could be sports, health, history, cooking, or traveling, etc. with all of these different experiences being shared together.
The more experiences you share, the more love is built. You build and strengthen intimacy when they prioritize your personal growth as your potential spouse teaches you new things. The relationship remains fun and exciting for a long period, because there’s always something to discuss while you exchange perspectives about things you never knew.
9. Improve His Interest in You
It’s normal for your spouse to be interested in you from the first day, so it becomes a daily routine. However, what makes a good spouse is how they maintain and improves their interest in you as your relationship gets older. This may include showing interest in things that are fun for you, even if they do not necessarily like to participate in them.
For example, if you have a favorite artist, following you to their concert to see you have fun is a good indication of interest. The more they do this, the better they get to know you and share in your fun.
10. Give Respect to You and the Relationship
Mutual respect is a key requirement in marriage, as much as it is in any long-term relationship. A good potential spouse must respect the love of their life at all times, and respect must be extended to all areas of life. Respecting you and your boundaries offers both parties great value.
Respect also keeps the two of you secure around friends, colleagues, and family. While your spouse respects you, I welcome you to also become invested in reciprocating this respect for them, and never betray it.
11. Acknowledgement and Effort to Work on Shortcomings
Most importantly, there is no perfect spouse. Every person has flaws and shortcomings including ourselves. Therefore, sometimes he or she may not be aware enough to always get it right. However, as long as the two of you strive to better yourselves for the sake of the relationship, it can help the relationship to survive longer and make each other happier.
Final Thoughts
What are the qualities of a good spouse? It varies from individual to individual, but improved interest, planning activities, teaching you new things, and respecting you are some great qualities. We think men and women who embody some or all of the above qualities stand a good chance of having a happy marriage, happy life, and a successful relationship.